life's track back

Oh God!!

Let me out to cry my feelings.

That climbs the walls of madness.

That rides away the waves of misery.

Is there a way to let me out?

Oh God!!

Life is a prison,

Show me a way to let me out!

No matter if I fall;

But it is better without one.

Oh god!

Watching freedom is painful;

Wishing for a window!

To see the fascinating earth,

Let it makes me to aim high.

Oh God!

Let my mind makes its choice,

Seeing the joy and feeling the love.

With rules to adhere

And enforce it too!

Oh God!

Let me find the way,

For my locked desires,

There’s no one to care for that,

Another price that my God will pay!

Oh God!

Let me hide the pain,

Lock it up all inside me.

Carry on with all courage,

This will be a key for my success!

Oh God!

Don’t let on what I’m not,

What I’m pretending to be!

By killing all these,

Let me be unique!

Oh God!

How do I grow?

Without destroying my life ride?

How my days are to be?

How to defuse my worries?

Oh God!

I left everything to you,

Make this year fruitful.

Look out for that one day,

When it all just explodes.

Oh God!

At least this year, which I pray!

In this New Year!

Love is a..????

Greatest feeling:

Mirror of a heart!

Belongings to my feelings,

My love is what I feel for you...

Every second of my life...

Love is a...???

Beautiful smile that tenders my heart,

Ever heard melody with the rhythm of love,

Bond of my emotions that keeps me strong,

The way to show the meaning of my life,

Was that love??

Or the bond of you in the name of love???

The love of my soul,

I love the way you love me!!

That enters my veins in the sense of spirit...

Like a love that I can't control,

So to remember when your eyes meet mine.

I love you with all my heart....

To shower my entire soul in you!!!

With love…

** College** i really have no idea whether i studied in college, but my college life rocks!! Never in class..Never even in department.. but somewhere inside the campus, it can be in canteen, not always for having food.. complete chatting!! or my college's gals corner, bramam hall** just to sit simply!

We wished, we should have on duty for all three years, but actually we dint get officially. But we managed to get by Bunking class, not even a single soul in my class without bunking. we love mass bunks, caught red handed while going out of the class.. but still what bothers us??? we will just leave the class!! know the three years of thrill, spirit of teens, raggings - a three years absolute fun!! cant ever forget it.

we too had assignments?? but assignments... fun,, really want to know?? we never want our professors to read all 40 assignments and assess it!! if he reads one or two, he can assess the whole class.. Our internals.. people we had professor who let us to copy for few hrs!! but just only three years. But not only him, all our professors are like that!! Our seminars, i dont think we had professional seminars, we are entertainers so as our seminars also!! But we had fun in college, but we had too many hard times also!! fights, misunderstandings,, admist all this we had loads of fun to remember!! jenny club is our other place where you guys can find us, that too i & kavi.. everyday.

i had good friends, who really cared for me.. i'm still happy for me having them! they dint let me drown at any of my hard times, they were with me. Kavitha, the gal whom i admired a lot!! i will never get a friend like her.. the gal of promising friendship with a lovable caring and beautiful smile. miss you dear! you mean a lot my life. Divya, roopa - the two close buddies of my life! sweet piggies..i miss them too!Kavi's home is my residence, you can find me all time after college and divi's home is our college most of days.. where you can find us. All that we do there is eating, eating & only eating but chatting too. the next roopa's home, the place we enjoyed the most.I also have few more friends, sudha ( huh! i seriously dono what to say) and rithu, we had lots of fight, but still we managed to be together. And muthu, vasanth these were the two guys who entertained us a lot. Vasanth to mean a bridge between guys and us, too causual guy. And muthu - the guy whom i fight a lot for no reason. Anu & Harshi, was also in the culprit gang of us!

probably this was one side of my college life, wherelse there is an another also, my love!! started in college, the perfect bonding!! the guy who made my life.. i started going to college atleast to see his face.. he often stares at me for my silly things, but he loves that i knew. he's my perfect mother too. i just cant forget each and every second when i was with him. As usual me blah blah!! keep talking!! with him and he, poor guy keep listening. the day when we started going around till now, i never kept my mouth shut. He the one who read my life completely.

College life gives so many things, hard & happy times. absolute thrill, each day of college was a sweet memories.. college we can never forget! our's was a true entertainment and place of sharing, bonding, ego, fights, misunderstandings, silly craps!!

i miss my college life...

Advertising, the world of creations is dead!! i don't know when people will understand the creativity. the one who does, all that clients says will fall, the one does the opposite of all, also falls. But damn if agencies are not able to sell the creative designed by them, then whats the use of being in creative field???

oh man!! Ego!! where does it plays role in creative? if you are a designer you know about designing! servicing, then your are meant to service only!! throwing your thoughts in layout, design, copy, art; hell its is!! its not a fantasy as you mean! the 10 secs creative, takes 10 long days to run!! this is acceptable. But in ten long days, till ninth day changing the concept and last day doing something which is not worth at all!! will not help!!

I started hating this! You are not asked to compromise your wealth!! but why cant you do justice to your profession?? I knew many will accept this. As people outside will know, ad agencies are happy to work! only to think!! but here, we will think of a concept. But when i write a line and show it to client, his thoughts turns to be my second line!! meeting client.. Bull shit every one's thought will turn into a line! and at last, the written concept is no more mine! But the only one i have is the copyrights!! It is done my me?? it is ridiculous!!

What ever client says we should not reject! but take what is possible and leave what not possible by explaining them!! if you do what all your client says and you satisfy your present client, it means that you are keeping the one client and leaving other two new clients!! Always you should not speak about your creative.. your works should speak about your creativity and talent!!

But don't know when this will happen.. but still there are agencies which look for their creative, they stand out!! But many agencies are not!! I don't when this situation will change!!

I faced a situation where no need of clients to change the job, within agency itself the changes will happen!! Finally it will be not design what was created!! i saw people who does DTP works in the name of designer!! how painful that is?? its like killing one's new born child!! If you be in position only you will know the pain!!

Please people let the creative people to think and do their creative, you can be a top person in an agency, but it is not that you know everything. if you have years of experience in creative, you can be better creator not the seller, if you are a servers you can be a better seller!! Please people Critics on the creative is what we need!! please don't redesign the whole job in the name of changes!! Do understand Creator's mind!! We do our job for money!! but at the end of the day we leave without happiness!! job satisfaction is the only one which can take you to heights!! you are giving us wealth and compromising our talent and dignity!!

When i think about the

** My life or My Love**

I'm speechless!! because my life means my love!! the perfect blend between the two!! at times it makes me pride, about the way we are!! damn it is too mean to say I'm pride!! but Wat's wrong in saying... i wouldn't have imagined my life.. so studious.. so dramatic but it all happened at a second!! the moment when i saw him smiling.. but not to me, so sad of that. but still it mesmerised me a lot!! i at times think, if i haven't met him that time! what would happened to my life?? I'm surprised. though i can't imagine a life without him right now, I'm happy that i saw him!!

Its almost years together we guys met, but still i fall for his smile!! The way he's to me, the care he got for me or the showered affection.. what made me crazy on him?? some miracle happened in my life four years before, with a promising words of bonding two souls!! All that rided us together till now, but there's a long way to go!! At this point just, Praying to God, only onething! i should ever keep him happy, as like now!!

He mean a lot to me!! he made my life!!!

I just happened to read my friend's blog where he expressed his thoughts on recent terrorism!! My blood bleeds for all innocents who lost their lives because of these attacks!! But i would always think how God even created such evil scoundrel's in the beautiful world!! These misguided evils put an end to many innocent that too in the name of Allah!!!! God is only to preach well in one's mind!! Not to kill lives and their dreams!! How much dream they might had on their life?? How much responsibilities they had on society and family?? These cruel killers must be punished!!

They are not brave! They killed so many innocents but still they are cowards!! They mean nothing to the world!! They deserve that!! But when i think about the recent statement of Pakistan Government!! **they are not ready to hand over them to Indian Government!!**, i still worried where the human races are racing up to!! Life means a lot!! In that short span of life why this arrogant way of approach??

Now, after so many controversies yesterday there was news on arrest of terrorists in Pakistan!! When they are capable of tight hold all the terror heads in a day!! Why can’t they raise a voice against terror??? Killing people in the name of Allah!! Even He, the Almighty would think of killing those scoundrels’s!! Let this be the high time for us all to think of anti-terror!! Please people!! Mother Earth is crying!! Leave this land to be a holy place!! Not a burial ground!! Still heat of died relations are not rested!! This land can’t withstand any more terror attacks!!

No more war also!! Raise your voices together against terror and not the Pakistan or Islam!! There are also so any innocents like us!! Like me, like you!! Let us think about that too!! Those evils are trying to hide themselves in the mask of Islam and Pakistan!! Now the whole responsibility is on Pakistan to prove that they are also humans and they kill those unwanted evils from their holy land!!

Ha ha ha.... the only thing i would do perfectly is TALKING TALKING TALKING TALKING

PPl murmuring around me in pity voices.... "Oh my God!!! dis female wont shut her mouth" but der r also ppl to hear all my bull shits!! but they never like to see me quiet.. once in blue moon i actually tried.. hmm... its tooooooo hard!!!! i shouted to let people know my joblessness.. but that continued to be my job further.. now celebrating my absolute joblessness with the sense of scribbling!! haaahooo... boredom kills me!! no innovation, truely mechanic d lyf!! i hard to get people to enjoy!! just was thinking s der sum way to get along with people!!! at last found!!! All that s der betwen me and world is my words!!! God made my day!!! now that i mention, i dnt actually recall being born here in blog bt i must have generated my self when i was quiet.........

All i'm suppose to do now is publish the post, so the readers can proof read it... let me correct it tomo!! thnks buddies.. going to sleep soundly tonight!!! And for now i wrapped all my well-wishes, best intentions and most competitive hugs in anti-croast wrapping paper!!! Fuctional ans tasty!!! keep going!!! seeya............

Thats it buddies!!! go to your cage (proof reading) without any supper!!! let me sleep for a while 12 hrs!!!

whoohoo!! ppl i'm exactly jobless so started to blog!!! oyie its nt to serve any purpose!! i started from now on, just to say what i'm not... i may nt be d reflection of my surreal surrounding's or my life!! bt my creative talent!! hmmm.. Generally ppl say me to be talkative... but no one s ready to hear me!! huh.. Why ppl??? So i started to write.. dis is no where banned!! Kindly adjust guys, der s actually a very long way to go!! Will sure make the blog interesting..

abt me!!! Exactly no idea what to do!! what ever happens trying to take it and letting it to go!!! In that least thing i would do is expressing myself!! Damn! Life is tooooo long.. Too much secret tunnels!! But lotta der to share!! An unedited version of my life!!